As a coach, I have had the extreme privilege of watching my clients cross the finish line in a burst of glory. This is a great feeling. On the flip side, I have also sat in the dug-out and watched clients miss the goal by a mile. What is the difference? Why do some people succeed at goals where others fail? Why do we succeed at some things and miss fail miserably at other things in life? I do not claim to have all the answers, but here are some common threads I have observed.
1) We are more likely to fall short if we aren’t personally connected to the goal. For example, let’s say that your goal is to earn $1 Million next year. Great! But, why is that important to you personally; what will change as a result of reaching that goal; what bigger goals are you trying to reach here? I find that when you don’t connect the underlying goal to the numeric or quantifiable goal, it is harder to stay on track.
2) Your goals have to be your own goals, not someone else’s. If you don’t “own” your goal, it is just too easy to bail out when the going gets tough. Take the person who decides to lose weight to please someone else. How often do you really think that works? On the other hand, what if you decide to lose 10 pounds because you will be healthier and feel great?
3) If a goal is too big it may start to feel impossible. Let’s take the $1 Million goal again, and let us assume that you are starting at zero dollars. That is a pretty big leap; not impossible, but big. So, what is the first step you could take to get there? For a start up company, it is the first client, and then the second, the third and so on. Remember the famous saying by Confucius “A journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step.” Don’t make the goal so big that you feel like you cannot take the first step.
4) Sometimes the goal is too vague. I had a client several years ago who told me that his goal was “to be rich.” Great, but what does “rich” look like to you? Is rich one million or five million. And why is it important to you? A vague goal is just as unproductive as no goal at all.
5) When the goal is particularly big, it really helps to map out the benchmarks along the route. I am a big advocate of celebrating the mini-goals on the longer journey. If you set a goal to lose 50 pounds, what is your goal for this week? And what will you do to reward yourself for reaching it? (No, it’s not a banana split!) Rewards don’t have to be big; the idea is to take a moment to recognize and acknowledge you progress.
6) If you keep your goals a secret, you run a higher risk of not succeeding. I would go so far as to say that if you don’t tell anyone what your goal is, you are giving yourself permission to wimp out. Share your goals with other people and then give them permission to hold you accountable! Yes, I said it – accountability. Whether it is a friend, colleague, partner, coach or mentor, we should all have someone who will hold us accountable to our goals.
So, set quantifiable goals; know why they are really important to you; be specific; map out your route; identify benchmarks; and tell the world! Here is to your success.
Deborah Bifulco is co-founder of The Coach Academy, http://thecoachacademy.com specializing in tools and niche training for mentors, advisers, coaches and consultants.
Deborah has trained and mentored hundreds of coaches and consultants around the world, through one-on-one mentoring, group coaching, webinars and live training.
She is a Certified Guerrilla Marketing Coach, Certified Professional Behavioral Analyst, Certified Master Mentor, Analyst in Axiology, Master Behaviors Coach, and Certified Values Coach. She co-authored “Guerrilla Marketing on the Front Lines” in 2008.
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